Dear Rusi,

I often wonder if there will be a time when my whole heart space isn’t filled with you?

I wonder if there will be a time that every corner of my heart isn’t saved for you?

I don’t want to spend my life lonely in love. I know that much. But for now, nobody even comes close to knocking you off the pedestal. I want you only.

Men show an interest and I consider it for about a quarter of a second. Then, I just stop talking to them because… Nope. They’re not you, I want you.

I know it’s because “I’m just not ready”. Will I ever be? Will I ever be ready to open my heart and let someone else in? Will someone make my heart flutter like you did? Will there ever be another someone who can smile with a glint in his eye that makes my heart skip a beat? I only needed to look at you to know I was home. You can’t replace a best friend like that. Not that you’d want to but I know what I need to be happy. You made me so happy.

Nearly 16mths and it’s almost like I’m still waiting for you to walk in the door and say, “Only lying, baby! What’s for dinner?”

I miss you everyday. Every minute. Every second. Love you. MP xx